Pregnancy: a third trimester summery

As we come closer to the end of this pregnancy, I think both Steve and I are feeling a bit unprepared for what lies ahead. Certainly, we have some clue about parenting now that we didn't have when we brought Silas home, but still, I think we are excited and apprehensive at the same time. I suppose that's normal.

Being pregnant hasn't been very easy this time. Perhaps it's that I'm 32, not exactly a "young" mother. The first trimester was really a blur of guarded emotions and fatigue. The second trimester was NOT what the books said it should have been - the high point in the pregnancy when I should be feeling my best. Instead, I was struggling with extreme insomnia and terrible muscle pain. I would lay down after a busy day and my whole body would be one tight contraction refusing to release.

Finally, I threw my back out the morning before a trip to Northern Michigan. I had been unloading the dishwasher when I felt a snap and that was it. I called "doctor mom", who prescribed additional magnesium, which acts as a large muscle relaxer. She had recently pulled a muscle in her back and found relief when she increased her magnesium intake. When we looked into it, we found that a pregnant woman should be getting 450 mg a day, and I was only getting 100 mg in my prenatals! Well, no wonder I was so tight! Within 2 weeks I was feeling soooooo much better! It was amazing! I could still be active and not pay for it all through the night!

Soon after, I interviewed a doula to assist us with my delivery, and she inquired about my calcium intake. I thought I was getting enough until she asked about insomnia and leg cramps. It had become a joke how little I was sleeping (maybe 2-3 hours a night!) and just two nights before I had the most servere charlie horse in my life! I started taking a calcium/magnesium supplement before going to bed and began sleeping better immediately!

Why didn't my regular OB tell me about this?!? It's not that I haven't been sharing my symptoms with her. It's so frustrating that we think we are getting good prenatal care, when really all we are getting is some mild monitoring and someone who will show up at the last minute to whisk our baby away and suggest loads of medical intervention which will serve more to protect her liability than provide the best for the health and comfort of mommy and baby. This is one reason we are hiring a doula. I just want to feel like someone is holding my hand, listening to me and making helpful suggestions which actually provide relief.

So here we are on the home stretch, just 6 weeks to go. It dawned on me last week that this delivery may not be anything like my delivery with Silas. I was planning on going two weeks early, but then I realized that I won't be under the same stressful conditions that I was under when I had Silas. Thankfully, I will not be working 14 hours the day before I go into labor. I have the luxury of resting throughout the day (not always as much as I would like, but as much a mother of a very active four and a half year old boy will allow.) And so now I am preparing mentally that I might actually be late, going past my due date (Novemeber 22, the week before Thanksgiving).

Still, even with my revised time frame of 4-8 weeks, there is still so much to be done. Our "To Do" list keeps growing daily, and the feeling that we are unprepared is keeping me from getting the rest that I need. I can't manage to stay off my feet and lately they have been swelling to elephant proportions. I need to take a picture of them, though it won't be pretty.

And these are our last days of being a family of three. I so enjoyed this summer with Silas, the ease of going places and the enjoyment of seeing things for the first time again through his eyes. Lately, I've been so busy preparing for the baby, that I haven't paused much to drink in these last few moments. I just need a few productive days of activity, and then I will feel I can stop. These are days to be thankful for, and I am very, very, very thankful.